Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Why I Do Most of My Crying in the Bathtub


because sometimes a steamy bathroom is the best confessional
because my tears mix beautifully with the water
because being surrounded by such incredible warmth feels like coming home
because nothing heals a bleeding heart better than water
because everything slips away so easily when floating weightlessly
because it's the one place I can truly embrace solitude
because there is safety in the solitude
because floating helps it flow
because grief needs stillness
because my sobs echo through the wetness, reminding me that it's good to feel,
even if it doesn't feel good
because in the quiet darkness, surrounded by warmth and candlelight,
I can hear God breathe

17 Comments:

Blogger liz elayne said...

the last line brought tears to my eyes. beautiful.

8:49 PM  
Blogger snowsparkle said...

The way you write makes even sadness beautiful. What a wondrous spirit you are. xxoo- snowsparkle

9:53 PM  
Blogger kiki said...

after a bad day a bath always makes everything better

10:23 PM  
Anonymous irene said...

guess it's time to redecorate my bathroom...

10:30 PM  
Blogger Kim Carney said...

IReading your post, I want to be sad again (did that for many years) it sounds so beautiful! I cried in my bathtub many times, thinking about what a terrible mother I would be. And then in years years back when there was a hole where my heart once was - I stayed in the bathtub alot then. But that passed. Now I take showers.

10:54 PM  
Blogger I am a Milliner's Dream, a woman of many "hats"... said...

*sigh*

I hope that the crying brings relief and joy comes in the morning...

Hh

10:57 PM  
Blogger Dak-Ind said...

what beautiful sentiment. the last line gave me a shiver, as i feel the same but never knew the words for it. thank you

11:15 PM  
Blogger Marit Cooper said...

I cry in the shower because it covers the sound, and when I step out I'm all wet anyway and no one will know. I'm glad you appreciate all your emotions, not just the bright and happy ones.... I wish I had a bathtub.

2:44 AM  
Blogger acumamakiki said...

Wow, that bathtub with candles seems like the most perfect place to let the tears flow. You are so in touch with your feelings, you bring thoughtfulness to my day every day.

4:40 AM  
Blogger kelly said...

beautiful!

4:54 AM  
Blogger firstborn studio said...

i love it when i can hear God breathe...i haven't been listening lately.
i love your writing.
xo,
denise

5:26 AM  
Anonymous Marilyn said...

I agree, a bath is a fabulous place to let it all out. But I also like just sneaking into bathrooms, in general, for that purpose. The other day, at work, I walked into the staff-only bathroom in the office...left the light off, with only a sliver showing under the door...and let myself shed a few tears in the dark. Took a few deep breaths, spashed some water on my face, went back to my desk and had a perfectly okay day after that...just needed the release.

Love your necklace...just wore mine to work yesterday. Seeing your photo just reminded me...think I'll take it on my weekend trip...I could use a little Andrea energy this weekend. ;)

6:30 AM  
Blogger Trish said...

So Beautiful. That last line hits you in the gut. How do you do it :O)

7:11 AM  
Blogger Heather said...

I agree. I love baths, with cadles just like this photo, though I haven't taken one in awhile because the bathtubs so darn dirty :(. I love the last line.

8:15 AM  
Blogger Living Part Deux said...

Precise spare words. All emotion. Everyone can relate and shed a tear with you. Cleansing inside and out - sacramental. And God's breathing can say so much.

11:07 AM  
Anonymous LB said...

Phenomenal poem.

That looks like the perfect bath. I love how it's lit only by candles.

1:34 PM  
Blogger Michelle Fry said...

I really like the line "Grief needs stillness". So true.

2:33 PM  

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